Allies & Advocates Resource Manual
Sponsored by the Dean of Students Office http://www.gvsu.edu/dos
Developed in 2002-03 by Terah Zaremba, Allies & Advocates graduate student intern.
Disclosure: Every attempt has been made to credit the original authors wherever possible. Much of the information contained in this manual has been distributed widely and has come from secondary sources. It is the hope of the committee members of Allies & Advocates that the original authors understand the educational nature of this program and consent to the use of their work. Table of Contents
Table of Contents
1 Does it Really Matter?
2 The Allies & Advocates Program
3
Allies & Advocates Mission Statement
3
Purpose
3
The Allies & Advocates Symbol
3
Resource Manual
4
Guidelines for Allies & Advocates Members
4
Definition of an Ally
5
Ideal Qualities of an Ally
5 The Allies & Advocates Member Commitment
6 Becoming an Ally ? What You Need to Know
7
Benefits of Being an Ally
7
Four Levels of Development
7
Ally Development Models
8
Strategies for Being an Effective Ally
10 Understanding Heterosexism
12
Heterosexual Privilege
12 Understanding Homophobia
14
Exploring Personal Homophobia
14
Levels of Homophobia
14
Suggestions for Combating Heterosexism and Homophobia
15 Language, Language, Language
17
Avoiding Heterosexual Bias in Language
17
Glossary of Common GLBT Language
18 What Allies Need to Know about Working with GLBT Students
20
Coming Out
20
The Cass Model of Gay/Lesbian Identity Development
21
Developmental Concerns for GLBT Students
23
Suggestions for Working with GLBT Students
24 Heterosexual Questionnaire
26 GLBT Supportive Environment Assessment
27 A Brief History of Homosexuality in America
28 In the News
31
Every Child Deserves a Safe Place to Learn
31
Sexual Minorities on Community Colleges Campuses
32 Resources
35
Campus Resources
35
Community Resources
35
State and National Resources
36 References
38 Does It Really Matter?
Written by an anonymous high school student
My father asked if I'm gay I asked, "Does it matter?" He said, "No, not really" I said, "Yes" He said, "Get out of my life" I guess it mattered.
My boss asked if I'm gay I asked, "Does it matter?" He said, "No, not really" I said, "Yes" He said, "You're fired faggot" I guess it mattered.
My friend asked if I'm gay I asked, "Does it matter?" He said, "No, not really" I said, "Yes" He said, "Don't call me your friend" I guess it mattered.
My lover asked, "Do you love me?" I asked, "Does it matter?" He said, "Yes" I told him, "I love you" He said, "Let me hold you in my arms For the first time in my life, something matters.
My God asked me, "Do you love yourself?" I said, "Does it matter?" He said, "YES" I said, "How can I love myself? I'm gay" He said, "That's the way I made you"
Nothing will ever matter again.
The Allies & Advocates Program "If someone leads, others will follow." - Anonymous
Allies & Advocates Mission Statement
Allies & Advocates exist to offer support and resources in a safe environment for members of the GVSU community concerned with issues of sexual orientation.
Purpose
Allies & Advocates' goal is to develop and maintain a network of informed faculty and staff who are willing to be visibly supportive of students who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender (GLBT), and who will work to foster a campus climate in which all students, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, may feel safe, supported, respected, and affirmed.
Allies & Advocates provides training and support services to gay-affirmative faculty and staff members who will, in turn, provide support and provide resources for GLBT students at GVSU. "Neutrality" is not enough for the optimal growth of our students as it leads to invisibility. "Tolerance" carries with it an implicit disapproval, a premise that something tolerated is less than perfect. Instead, a positive and affirming environment is necessary for students to develop healthy self-esteems and to maximize their learning experience at Grand Valley State University.
The Allies & Advocates Symbol
The pink triangle is a symbol of pride used within the GLBT community and has been adopted by the Allies & Advocates program. Heterosexual allies need visual representation to distinguish themselves as well; therefore, the inclusion of the words "Allies & Advocates".
The Allies & Advocates symbol is a message to GLBT students and colleagues that you are knowledgeable, supportive, respectful, and trustworthy. Students will know they can come to you for help, advice, or just to talk with someone who is affirming of their sexual orientation. The symbol indicates that you will not tolerate homophobic and heterosexist comments and actions, but will address these in an educational and informing manner, combating ignorance, misinformation, and prejudice with education, accurate information, and understanding. Colleagues and students have a right to their opinion; however, if someone is stating myths or misinformation about GLBT individuals, Allies & Advocates members will provide them with accurate information in a respectful manner.
At the end of your Allies & Advocates training session, you will be invited to sign up to become an official member of Allies & Advocates. You will then be given a sign to post on your office door or someplace where it is visible to students who may be seeking information and/or support. The Allies & Advocates sign should be taped to your office door, within your workspace, on your living center door, or other public or semi-public place where others can see it, especially students.
Source: Adapted from the Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University Resource Manual
This resource manual is provided to all Allies & Advocates members. The information in the manual provides the basis for the Allies & Advocates training sessions. We encourage each of you to take time to read the contents and familiarize yourself with the information. It is designed to help you in accurately responding to the needs of students who seek information and your support. While the manual may serve as an excellent starting point, it represents only a small amount of essential information available on gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender issues.
Guidelines for Allies & Advocates Members
- Respect individual's privacy. Students will expect you to be understanding, supportive, and trustworthy. Confidentiality is essential: never "out" someone to a third party.
- Use language that reflects the student's development/life stage. For example, a student may be exploring issues relating to sexual orientation, but not yet identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Refer to the models in this manual for examples of appropriate language.
- Respect the boundaries of the students with whom you have contact: feel free to have coffee or lunch with students who seek you out for counsel, but maintain clear, professional boundaries as a teacher, advisor, or advocate at all times.
- Respect the needs of students that are beyond what your professional capabilities: refer students for counseling when appropriate. For example, if a student is experiencing overwhelming distress or difficulty coping, it may be appropriate to refer the student to the Counseling Department on campus, located in room 204 of the Student Services Building; the phone number is 331-3266.
- If your Allies & Advocates sign is defaced or torn down, contact the Allies & Advocates coordinator for a new sign.
- Please inform the Allies & Advocates coordinator if you are leaving the
University community or if you want to withdraw from the program.
- Keep your resource manual and other reference materials in a location that is easily accessible to you. It is permissible to copy materials from this manual for educational purposes.
- Please consult fellow Allies & Advocates members whenever you have questions or would like feedback on how to support or advise a student.
Source: Adapted from the Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University
Definition of an Ally
An ally is as an individual who works to end oppression personally and professionally through support and advocacy of an oppressed population (Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University), in this context gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender individuals. Allies may be prompted to action because they have personal and professional relationships with GLBT individuals or because they are alarmed at the pervasive negative attitudes towards GLBT people in a heterosexist society. Although most Allies & Advocates members are heterosexual, it is important to understand that GLBT individuals can be allies to themselves by actively supporting the needs of their community. Ally development occurs in stages, a process that will be disclosed in this manual as well as during training.
Source: Adapted from the Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University
Ideal Qualities of an Ally
An Ally: - Has worked to develop an understanding of GLBT people and their needs. - Chooses to align with lesbians, gays, and bisexuals and responds to their needs. - Believes that it is in her/his self-interest to be an ally. - Is committed to the personal growth (in spite of the probability of discomfort and possible pain) required. - Is quick to take pride in personal success in responding to homophobia and overcoming fears. - Expects support from other allies. - Is able to acknowledge and articulate how patterns of fear have operated in his/her lives. - Expects to make some mistakes but does not use it as an excuse for non- action. - Knows that both sides of an ally relationship have a clear responsibility for their own response to the oppression whether or not persons on the other side choose to respond. - Knows that in the most empowered ally relationships, the persons in the non-oppressed role initiate the change toward personal, institutional, and societal justice and equality. - Knows that he/she is responsible for humanizing or empowering their role in society, particularly as their role relates to responding to homophobia. - Promotes a sense of community with lesbians, gays, and bisexual people and teaches others about the importance of outreach. - Has a good sense of humor.
Source: Condensed from N.J. Evans & V. Wall, 1991.
Allies & Advocates Member Commitment
I, _____________________________________, hereby have permission to be imperfect with regard to people who are different from me. It is okay that I do not know all of the answers about GLBT issues or if, at times, my ignorance and misunderstandings become obvious. I have permission to ask questions. I have permission to struggle with issues and to be honest about my feelings.
I am, however, committed to educating myself and others about oppression, heterosexism, and homophobia, and to combating them on a personal level.
I am committed to working toward providing a safe, confidential support network for members of the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender community.
I am committed to treating each person with the dignity and respect to which they are entitled as human beings.
I am the product of a heterosexist culture and I am who I am. I do not have to feel guilty about what I know or believe, but I do need to take responsibility for what I can do now:
- Learn as much as I can.
- Struggle to change my false/inaccurate beliefs or oppressive attitudes towards gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people.
______________________________________________ _____________________ Signature Date
Source: Adapted from Aggie Allies resource manual - Texas A&M University.
Becoming an Ally . . . What You Need to Know
Benefits of Being an Ally
- You open yourself up to the possibility of close relationships with a significant portion of the population. - You have an opportunity to be a part of the GLBT movement for equality. - You may become less likely to stereotype according to sex roles. - You may increase your ability to have close and loving relationships with same-sex friends. - You have opportunities to learn from, teach, and have an impact on a population with whom you might not otherwise interact with. - You may be the reason an individual finally decides that his or her life is worth something.
Source: Condensed and adapted from N.J. Evans & V. Wall, 1991.
Four Levels in Ally Development
AWARENESS It is important to become more aware of who you are and how you are different from and similar to GLBT people. Strategies to do this include: 1. Conversations with GLBT people. 2. Attending awareness-building workshops. 3. Reading about the GLBT culture 4. Self-examination
KNOWLEDGE/EDUCATION You must begin to acquire knowledge about sexual orientation and what the experience is for GLBT people in society and within the campus community. You can do this by: 1. Learning about laws, policies, and practices and how they affect GLBT people. 2. Educating yourself about the GLBT culture and norms in this community. 3. Contacting local and national GLBT organizations for information.
SKILLS You must develop skills in communicating the knowledge that you have learned. You can do this by: 1. Attending workshops. 2. Role play situations with friends. 3. Developing support connections.
ACTION Action is, without a doubt, the only way that you can affect change in the society as a whole; for, if you keep our awareness, knowledge, and skills to ourselves, you are in danger of becoming counteractive to all of the work you have done towards becoming an ally.
Source: Condensed from N.J. Evans & V. Wall, 1991.
Ally Developmental Models
Knowing your own process of awareness not only helps you to better understand yourself, but also to understand others in their process of developing. The following model is based on the Jackson and Hardiman Social Identity Development Model (Broido, 2000) and applied to being an ally for GLBT people.
STAGE ONE - Nave No understanding that same-sex affection, love, and physical attractions can occur or be valued.
STAGE TWO - Acceptance Passive Acceptance - A person unconsciously identifies with and accepts the dominant group's (or majority) views; denies existence of oppression and/or blames GLBT people for their condition. People in this group unconsciously act on and propagate stereotypes and discrimination against GLBT people.
Active Acceptance - A person consciously identifies with the majority's views and accepts the privilege inherent with being heterosexual. People in this group consciously act on and propagate stereotypes and discrimination against GLBT people.
STAGE THREE - Resistance People enter resistance as they begin to learn more about or encounter GLBT people and consciously question the majority view and privilege. People begin to recognize oppression, injustice, and discrimination resulting from homophobia and heterosexism. In this stage, people experience a wide variety of feelings - anger, shame, rage, and impotence. It is also a stage where people actively work to learn about the GLBT culture and begin to challenge homophobic comments
and jokes.
Passive Resistance - Often the person feels overwhelmed by the problem and incapable of action. They at least try to not perpetuate the oppression.
Active Resistance - People in this group are actively and deliberately confronting social norms and individual's behaviors. They may actively become part of advocacy groups or disassociate from others in the majority group who are perpetuating oppression and discrimination.
STAGE FOUR - Redefinition In this stage, heterosexual allies return to examining their own identity. Realizing there are ways to be a members of the dominant group other than just as an oppressor, they begin to ask themselves, "who am I?" People seek out other like-minded individuals and non-oppressive ways to use their privilege. A new pride in being heterosexual can be developed as an understanding is reached about the inner-relatedness of all types of oppression.
STAGE FIVE - Internalization During this stage, the new identity carved out in stage four becomes more grounded and integrated, requiring less effort. Understanding majority group privilege and its impact on all aspects of a person's like helps that person to expand their work into all areas of oppression. (Hardiman stated that very few people actually reach this level of development.)
Tyler, Jackman-Wheitner, Strader, & Lenox (1997) proposed another model of change with regard to GLBT issues, called the Transtheoretical Model of Change. It is helpful when working with colleagues and students to keep in mind this process of change.
Characteristics of Individuals at Each Stage of the Transtheoretical Model of Change with Regard to GLBT Issues
Pre-Contemplation Contemplation Action Maintenance Statements "It's fine with me if someone is gay. I don't understand the need to talk about GLBT issues." "I guess I treat GLBT people differently than I do straight people." "I'm going to change the way I've done things in the past." "I'm glad I've made changes to become more supportive of GLBT people." Thoughts People are people. GLBT people have been treated unfairly in the past. GLBT people deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. My life is enriched by my relationships and the contributions made by GLBT individuals. Feelings Confusion about the need to discuss or receive training. Embarrassed and ashamed about past statements or behavior. Excited about new attitudes and experiences. Fear about other's reactions. Pride in personal accomplishment and efforts to be an ally. Behavior No extended contact or association with GLBT individuals. Has never attended GLBT oriented activities. Seeking out opportunities to expand knowledge or gain new perspectives. Choosing to more closely affiliate with GLBT individuals and deepening relationships. Nurturing relationships with GLBT individuals. Attending ally support groups
and other GLBT activities.
Source: K. Poynter, Western Michigan University Strategies for Being an Effective Ally
Challenging attitudes and institutional practices that curtail the rights of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender students require verbal tactics and strategies of intervention and interruption. Teachable moments abound in the area of GLBT concerns because the general public is usually quite open about its anti-gay sentiments.
The following items are meant only as guides to how you might begin to be more inclusive of GLBT people, communities, issues, and concerns in your personal and institutional life.
- Understand that heterosexism and homophobia affect all of us and that one must work on ridding oneself of it - even if one is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. Heterosexism and homophobia are also experienced cross-culturally.
- Assume that in any group there are GLBT people present. Use language that is inclusive and avoid using language that speaks to people as if heterosexuality and its institutions were the only choices. Also avoid that homosexuality is a European invention. Accept that GLBT people are part of the multicultural mosaic.
- In professional interactions with peers, students, professionals, and others, take an anti-heterosexist stance. Make it known that you support, as the institution, the rights of GLBT people to express their identity openly if they choose.
- After assessing the risks, challenge and interrupt homophobic and heterosexist remarks and behaviors. Take an educational approach. Ask for clarification. Question.
- Continue to educate yourself about sexual diversity as well as homophobia and heterosexism as well as their cultural, social, and political implications - e.g. attend campus programs, see films and TV shows, visit GLBT bookstores, read articles, and interact with GLBT students and colleagues.
- Use the terms "gay", "lesbian", "bisexual", or "transgender" and refrain as much as possible from using the term "homosexual" in reference to GLBT people.
- If you are a heterosexual, learn (by doing) not to become defensive or distracted from your anti-heterosexist stance at work when people "accuse" you of being gay or lesbian because simply because you have taken a pro-gay stance. If you are a GLTB person but are not out in your professional role, try not to let fears of exposure prevent you from taking an anti-heterosexist stance.
- Accept that bisexuality is viable sexuality and lifestyle rather than the posture of a confused person or a person who is rejecting a gay or lesbian identity.
- When a GLBT person comes out to you, affirm him or her and respond as you would to any other person who reveals important or sensitive information. Remember that it is okay to ask questions.
- Integrate GLBT concerns into the concerns of minority student communities.
- Resist privileging heterosexuality and heterosexual relationships and institutions in programs, services, classrooms, leisure time, and social activities.
- Understand why there is a heterosexual privilege.
- Be supportive when a GLBT person is upset or angry about discriminatory treatment.
- Respect a person's choice not to reveal his or her GLBT identity.
- Believe in yourself!
- Recognize that everyone, both allies and GLBT people alike, are the product of a heterosexist and homophobic society.
- Assume that making mistakes is part of the learning process of being an effective ally. Acknowledge and apologize for mistakes; learn from them, but do not retreat as an ally.
- Be a 100% ally; no deals; no strings attached.
- Have a good understanding of sexual orientation and be comfortable with your own.
- Be aware of the coming out process and realize it is a lifelong process. The coming out process is unique to GLBT people and brings challenges that are not often understood.
- Understand that GLBT people receive the same messages about homosexuality and bisexuality as everyone else. Thus, GLBT people suffer from internalized homophobia and heterosexism. It is important to recognize the risks of coming out and to challenge the internal oppression.
- Remember that GLBT people are a diverse group - no two gay people are exactly alike in their experiences as a gay person.
- Know at least basic information about AIDS/HIV in order to address myths and misinformation and to be supportive of those effected by this disease, whether in themselves or in partners and friends. Remember that AIDS/HIV is a health issue for all, not just GLBT people.
Source: Adapted from 365-Day Odyssey through Sexual Orientation handbook.
Understanding Heterosexism
Heterosexism is the system of oppression of persons who are lesbian, gay, or bisexual based on homophobia. It includes these three components:
- The assumption that all people are heterosexual. - Prejudice and discrimination against persons who are GLBT based on the assumption that heterosexuality is the only "normal" sexual orientation and therefore preferable. - Systemic display of homophobia in societal institutions, laws, and policies by excluding the needs, concerns, and life experiences of persons who are GLBT.
Examples of Heterosexism: - Assuming that everyone you meet is heterosexual. - Assuming that everyone has or is interested in having an opposite-sex partner. - Assuming that all mothers and fathers are heterosexual. - Assuming all sexually active women use birth control. - Assuming that all unmarried people are "single," while in reality they may have a same-sex partner. - Assuming all children live in families with a male-female couple in parental roles. - Using language that presumes heterosexuality in others, such as husband or wife, instead of gender neutral language such as partner.
- Using official forms which allow only for designation as married or single. - Denying equal employment benefits to people with same-sex partners (i.e. spousal insurance). - Omitting any discussion of persons who are GLBT as part of educational curricula.
Source: Safe on Campus resource manual - Duke University
Heterosexual Privilege
Heterosexuals have the privilege of ? - Living without ever having to think twice, face, confront, engage, or cope with anything on this page. Heterosexuals can address these phenomena but social/political forces do not require you do so. - Marrying ? which includes the following privileges: ? Public recognition and support for an intimate relationship. ? Receiving cards or phone calls celebrating your commitment to another person. ? Supporting activities and social expectations of longevity and stability for your committed relationships. - Paid leave from employment and condolences when grieving the death of your partner/lover (i.e. legal members designed by marriage and descendants from marriages). - Inheriting from your partner/lover/companion automatically under probate laws. - Sharing health, auto, and homeowners' insurance policies at reduced rates. - Immediate access to your loved ones in cases of accident or emergency. - Family-of-origin support for a life partner/lover/companion. - Increased possibilities for getting a job, receiving on the job training, and promotion. - Kissing, hugging, and being affectionate in public without treat or punishment. - Talking about your relationship or what projects, vacations, family planning you and your partner/lover/companion are creating. - Not questioning your normalcy, sexually and culturally. - Expressing pain when a relationship ends and having other people notice and attend to your pain. - Adopting children, foster-parenting children. - Being employed as a teacher in a pre-school through high school without fear of being fired any day because you are assumed to corrupt children. - Raising children without threats of state intervention, without children having to be worried which of their friends might reject them because of their parent's sexuality and culture. - Dating the person of your desire in your teen years. - Living with your partner and doing so openly to all. - Receiving validation from your religious community. - Receiving social acceptance by neighbors, colleagues, and new friends. - Not having to hide and lie about same-sex social events.
Source: 365-Day Odyssey through Sexual Orientation handbook.
Understanding Homophobia
Exploring Personal Homophobia
Homophobia may be defined as an irrational fear or hatred of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuals or perceived homosexual behavior. Homophobia may be experienced by heterosexuals as well as by gay and lesbian persons. Homophobia is manifested at the personal level, as well as being widely institutionalized within our society. The following is intended to help individuals explore their personal experience of homophobia.
1. Have you ever stopped yourself from doing or saying something, because of a concern that someone might think you are gay or lesbian? 2. How did you respond the last time that someone around you told a joke about "fags" or "dykes" or made a derogatory comment about gays or lesbians? 3. Have you ever intentionally done or said something so that someone will think you are not gay or lesbian? 4. Do you believe that gays or lesbians can influence heterosexuals to change their sexual orientation? 5. Do you believe someone could influence you to change your sexual orientation? 6. How would you feel about having a gay son or daughter? How would you feel about having your child's same sex partner in your home? How would you feel about introducing your child and their partner at your church or at your place of employment? 7. How would you feel if one of your parents or parent figures, or one of your siblings came out to you as gay or lesbian? 8. Are there any jobs or professions which you think gays and lesbians should be barred from holding? What is your rationale for this belief? 9. Have you ever been to a gay or lesbian bar, social club, party, church, or civil rights march? If not, what has kept you away? 10.How would you feel about wearing a tee-shirt that says, "How dare you presume I'm heterosexual"?
Source: Safe Zone resource manual - Southern Mississippi University
Levels of Homophobia
Negative Levels of Attitude
REPULSION: Homosexuality is seen as a "crime against nature". Homosexuals are sick, crazy, immoral, sinful, wicked, etc., and anything is justified to change them (e.g. prison, hospitalization, behavior therapy including shock treatments).
PITY: Heterosexual chauvinism. Heterosexuality is more mature and certainly to be preferred. Any possibility of becoming straight should be reinforced and those who seem to be born "that way" should be pitied "the poor dears".
TOLERANCE: Homosexuality is just a phase of adolescent development that many people go through and most people "grow out of." Thus, lesbians, gays, and bisexuals are less mature than straights and should be treated with the protectiveness and indulgence one used with a child. Gays, lesbians, and bisexuals should not be given the positions of authority because they are still working through adolescent behaviors.
ACCEPTANCE: Still implies that this is something to accept, characterized by such statements as, "You're not gay to me, you're a person". Denies social and legal realities. Ignores the pain of invisibility and the stress of closet behavior.
Positive Levels of Attitude
SUPPORT: Work to safeguard the rights of lesbians, gays, and bisexuals. Such people may be uncomfortable themselves, but they are aware of the social climate and the irrational unfairness.
ADMIRATION: Acknowledges that being lesbian/gay/bisexual in our society takes strength. Such people are willing to truly look at themselves and work on their own homophobic attitudes.
APPRECIATION: Value the diversity of people and see gay/lesbian/bisexuals as a valid part of that diversity. These people are willing to combat homophobia in themselves and others.
NURTURANCE: Assume that lesbians, bisexuals, and gays are indispensable in our society. They view all homosexuals with genuine affection and delight and are willing to be open advocates.
Source: Obear, K. (1985) Opening Doors to Understanding and Acceptance: Facilitators
Suggestions for Combating Heterosexism and Homophobia
- Assume that wherever you go, gay and lesbian persons are present and wondering how safe the environment is for them. Do not assume that everyone you meet is heterosexual. Provide safety by making clear your support of gay and lesbian identity.
- Realize that the cultural oppression of gay and lesbian persons is perpetuated in social situations where display of physical affection is exclusively heterosexual. In consideration of this, where it is appropriate and mutually consensual, feel free to be physically affectionate with someone of the same sex.
- Challenge homophobia and heterosexism whether or not gay and lesbian persons are present. Do not always leave it to gays and lesbians to do it.
- Remembering that silence is complicity, challenge and confront anti-gay and lesbian statements and structures as well as the assumptions behind them. Do not promote the institutionalized invisibility of lesbians and gays.
- When speaking of your romantic partner or spouse, point out that he or she is of the opposite sex, implying that he or she may not have to be.
- Confront your own fears, negative memories, and bad feelings about gay and lesbian persons. Recall, work through, and release those feelings, thereby diminishing their hold on you.
- Do not assume that a gay and lesbian person of the same gender is automatically attracted to you. Do you assume that all straight people of the opposite gender are interested in you? If a gay or lesbian is attracted to you, try to be flattered, not offended. If it still bothers you, talk about it.
- Change your use of language to be more inclusive. Instead of "do you have a girl/boy friend", you might say "are you seeing anyone." Heterosexism is promoted and maintained powerfully through language.
- If people jump to the conclusion that you are gay or lesbian because of your friendships, because you are reading a gay or lesbian publication, or because you are being affectionate with someone of the same gender, resist you impulse to deny it. Challenge yourself to experience gay/lesbian oppression rather than taking advantage of heterosexual privilege.
- Respect the profound uniqueness and delicacy of the coming out process for each individual.
- Challenge the widespread, destructive misinformation about gay and lesbian persons by educating yourself so that you can respond to misinformation and untruth with correct information and truthfulness.
Source: 365-Day Odyssey through Sexual Orientation handbook.
Language, Language, Language
Avoiding Heterosexual Bias in Language
Language plays an important role not only in reducing heterosexual bias, but also in increasing the visibility of GLBT people and promoting positive images. Simply by being more aware of your own language use, you can be an advocate for the GLBT community.
Problems occur in language concerning the GLBT community when language is too vague or the concepts are poorly defined. There are two major problems of designation. First, language may be ambiguous in reference so that the person being communicated to is uncertain about the meaning or its inclusion and exclusion criteria. Secondly, the term homosexuality has been associated in the past with deviance, mental illness, and criminal behavior, and these negative stereotypes may be perpetuated by biased language.
- The term sexual orientation is preferred to sexual preference. The word preference suggests a degree of voluntary choice that is not necessarily reported by GLBT people and that has not been demonstrated in psychological research.
- Lesbian and gay male are preferred to the homosexual. The word homosexual has several problems of designation. First, it may perpetuate negative stereotypes because of its historical associations with pathology and criminal behavior. Second, it is often unclear.
- The terms gay male and lesbian refer primarily to identities and to the modern culture and communities that have developed among people who share those identities. They should be distinguished from sexual behavior. Some men and women have sex with other of their own sex but do not consider themselves to be gay or lesbian.
- While the term lesbian refers primarily to women and the term gay refers primarily to men, the term bisexual is used to refer to both men and women that are equally attracted to both sexes.
- The term transgender is preferred to transvestite, cross dresser, and transsexual. The word transgender is an umbrella term used to include all people who cross gender lines, including transsexuals, cross-dressers, and drag queens. Like the term homosexual, terms such as transvestite and transsexual also carry with it negative stereotypes.
- Terms such as partner or significant other is preferred to girlfriend or boyfriend.
Source: Condensed and adapted from the Committee on Lesbian and Gay Concerns, 1991
Glossary of Common GLBT Language
Ally: A person who supports and honors diversity, acts accordingly to challenge homophobic and heterosexist remarks and behaviors, and is willing to explore and understand these forms of bias within him or herself.
Androgyny: A profound blend of gender that blurs the distinction between masculine and feminine.
Bi-gender/Dual-gender: A person who possesses and expresses a distinctly masculine and a distinctly feminine persona; is comfortable and enjoys presenting in both gender roles.
Biphobia: The fear and hatred of or discomfort with people who are bisexual.
Bisexual: A person who is emotionally and sexually attracted to members of either sex, though not necessarily simultaneously.
Closet: To be "in the closet" means to hide one's sexual identity in order to keep a job, a housing situation, friends, or in some other ways, to survive. Many GLTB persons are "out" in some situations and "closeted" in others.
Coming Out: To publicly affirm one's sexual orientation, sometimes to one person in conversation, sometimes by an act that takes place in the public eye. It is not a single event, but a life-long process. In each new situation, a GLBT person must decide whether to disclose his or her sexual orientation.
Domestic Partner: One who lives with her or his beloved and/or is at least emotionally and financially connected in a supportive manner with another.
Drag King/Queen: A man or woman dressed as the opposite gender, usually overdone or exaggerated, often lesbian or gay.
Freedom Rings: A chain of six aluminum rings, each of a different color forming a rainbow to represent diversity; worn as a symbol of GLBT pride.
Gay: An umbrella term for homosexual people, although it most specifically refers to men who are attracted to other men. It is equally acceptable and more accurate to refer to gay women as lesbians.
Gender: The collection of characteristics that are culturally associated with maleness and femaleness; gender is to "masculine" and "feminine" as sex is "male" and "female".
Gender Blending or Bending: Dressing in such a way as to question the traditional feminine or masculine qualities assigned to articles of clothing or adornment; gender blending/bending may be part of "fashion" or possibly a "political statement".
Heterosexual: A person who is emotionally, romantically, sexually, affectionately, and relationally attracted to people of the opposite sex.
Heterosexual Privilege: Social benefits accorded to those individuals who identify as heterosexual.
Hermaphrodite: One who is born with both male and female sexual organs.
Homophobia: The fear of homosexuals or homosexuality, or of any behavior, belief, and/or attitude of self or others that does not conform to traditional, stereotypical sex roles. Also said to be the insecurity one has with his or her own sexuality.
Homosexual: A person who is emotionally and sexually attracted to members of the same sex.
Lesbian: A woman who is emotionally and sexually attracted to other women.
Outing: Making someone's sexual orientation known without his or her permission.
Queer: A term used most often by young gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people that is inclusive of all parts of their identity and behavior; many GLBT youth use this word as a "reclaiming of the term". Many older GLBT people feel that the word has been hatefully used against them and are reluctant to embrace it.
Rainbow Flag: The GLBT Rainbow Freedom Flag was designed in the 1970's to designate the immense diversity of the GLBT community; it is also a sign of GLTB pride.
Sexual Orientation: Used to describe everything that goes into why people are attracted to each other both emotionally as well as sexually.
Third Sex: Generally, a term applied to transgendered people who express a "gender alternative" to traditional masculine and feminine roles.
Transgender: An umbrella term used to include all people who cross gender lines, including transsexuals, cross-dressers, and drag queens.
Transsexual: One who wants to have, has had, or should have sex reassignment surgery. This also includes non-surgical transsexuals.
Transvestite/Cross-Dresser: One who from time to time wears the clothes of another gender.
Triangle: A symbol of remembrance. Gay men in the Nazi concentration camps were forced to wear the pink triangle. Lesbians had to wear the black triangle.
Source: 365-Day Odyssey through Sexual Orientation handbook
What Allies Need to Know about Working with GLBT Students
Coming Out
Coming out refers to a life-long process of developing a positive GLBT identity. It can be a difficult journey, because GLBT people must confront not only the widespread prejudice, discrimination, and homophobia of the persons and institutions of our society, but they must also confront and overcome the negative stereotypes, misinformation, and homophobia they learned and internalized while growing up. As GLBT people begin to accept themselves, hiding their feelings no longer feels like the best option. They stop denying who they are and begin telling others the truth. This process of self- acceptance and disclosure is referred to as "coming out of the closet" or simply "coming out".
"Coming out" is a process that may be conceptualized as occurring in three basic stages: self- acceptance, telling others, and integrating one's identity. These stages are not linear, nor do they happen only once. Each person's coming out journey is unique to them, and there is no right or wrong way to do it.
- Self-acceptance begins with an initial acknowledgment that one experiences emotional and sexual attraction to persons of the same gender, and may over time involve acknowledging a GLBT identity. Self-acceptance often involves accessing information from a variety of sources to begin constructing a positive GLBT identity. Initial efforts to meet other GLBT people are made. The inability to accept oneself, often due to internalized homophobia and shame, can be a significant barrier to being accepted by others. - Telling others tends to occur in steps, with persons often disclosing their identities initially to persons they feel will be most supportive. Beginning to share one's identity usually decreases feelings of isolation. Fear and expectation of rejection or exposure tends to cause many persons to avoid coming out to others, often even to those most likely to be accepting. - Integrating one's identity involves living in a genuine way, whether at work, in the community, or at home. It allows one to refocus the energy formerly used to hide and "pass" as heterosexual, and to live life to the fullest. Integrating one's identity includes talking about a romantic partner with family and friends and including them in holiday and other gatherings. At work, it may include talking to co-workers about one's personal life, or putting a picture of a partner on a desk, just like non-gay colleagues. It may also include getting involved politically.
To many Americans, gay and lesbian people are invisible. However, the truth is that gay and lesbian people are everywhere: as family members, co-workers, and neighbors. Gays touch the lives of millions of people who do not think they know anyone gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender.
- Coming out makes visible the reality of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender lives. - Coming out dispels myths and misinformation and turns ignorance and fear into acceptance. - Coming out means no longer hiding the truth about one's life. - Coming out is about living with integrity and genuineness. - Coming out opens possibilities for honest relationships with family, friends, and co-workers. - Coming out gives role models to others struggling with their sexual orientation. - Coming out empowers one to get involved and to work to make our nation a more civil and fair-minded place for everyone.
Source: Adapted from: Human Rights Campaign.
The Cass Model of Gay/Lesbian Identity Development
Adoption of a gay/lesbian identity is a developmental process of recognizing, accepting, and ultimately affirming one's gay or lesbian sexual orientation that encompasses six stages.
STAGE 1: Identity Confusion - Characterized by feelings of turmoil, in which one questions previously held assumptions about one's sexual orientation.
Task: Who am I? - Accept, Deny, Reject.
Possible Responses: Will avoid information about lesbians and gays; inhibit behavior; deny homosexuality ("experimenting," "an accident," "just drunk"). Males: May keep emotional involvement separate from sexual contact; Females: May have deep relationships that are non-sexual, though strongly emotional.
Possible Needs: May explore internal positive and negative judgments. Will be permitted to be uncertain regarding sexual identity. May find support in knowing that sexual behavior occurs along a spectrum. May receive permission and encouragement to explore sexual identity as a normal experience (like career identity, and social identity).
STAGE 2: Identity Comparison - Characterized by feelings of alienation in which one accepts that possibility of being gay or lesbian and becomes isolated from non-gay others.
Task: Deal with social alienation.
Possible Responses: May begin to grieve for losses and the things she or he will give up by embracing their sexual orientation. May compartmentalize their own sexuality. Accepts lesbian, gay definition of behavior but maintains "heterosexual" identity of self. Tells oneself, "It's only temporary"; I'm just in love with this particular woman/man", etc.
Possible Needs: Will be very important that the person develops own definitions. Will need information about sexual identity, lesbian, gay community resources, encouragement to talk about loss of heterosexual life expectations. May be permitted to keep some "heterosexual" identity (it is not an all or none issue).
STAGE 3: Identity Tolerance - Characterized by feelings of ambivalence in which one seeks out other gays and lesbians but maintains separate public and private images.
Task: Decrease social alienation by seeking out lesbians and gays.
Possible Responses: Beginning to have language to talk and think about the issue. Recognition that being lesbian or gay does not preclude other options. Accentuates difference between self and heterosexuals. Seeks out lesbian and
gay culture (positive contact leads to more positive sense of self, negative contact leads to devaluation of the culture, stops growth). May try out variety of stereotypical roles.
Possible Needs: Be supported in exploring own shame feelings derived from heterosexism, as well as external heterosexism. Receive support in finding positive lesbian, gay community connections. It is particularly important for the person to know community resources.
STAGE 4: Identity Acceptance - Characterized by selective disclosure in which one begins the legitimization (publicly as well as privately) of one's sexual orientation.
Task: Deal with inner tension of no longer subscribing to society's norm, attempt to bring congruence between private and public view of self.
Possible Responses: Accepts gay or lesbian self-identification. May compartmentalize "gay life". Maintains less and less contact with heterosexual community. Attempts to "fit in" and "not make waves" within the gay and lesbian community. Begins some selective disclosures of sexual identity. More social coming out; more comfortable being seen with groups of men or women that are identified as "gay". More realistic evaluation of situation.
Possible Needs: Continue exploring grief and loss of heterosexual life expectations. Continue exploring internalized "homophobia" (learned shame for heterosexist society). Find support in making decisions about where, when, and to whom he or she self discloses.
STAGE 5: Identity Pride - Characterized by anger, pride, and activism in which one becomes immersed in the gay subculture and rejects non-gay people, institutions, and values.
Task: Deal with incongruent views of heterosexuals.
Possible Responses: Splits world into "gay" (good) and "straight" (bad). Experiences disclosure crises with heterosexuals, as he or she is less willing to "blend in". Identifies gay culture as sole source of support; all gay friends, business connections, social connections.
Possible Needs: Receive support for exploring anger issues. Find support for exploring issues of heterosexism. Develop skills for coping with reactions and responses to disclosure of sexual identity. Resist being defensive!
STAGE 6: Identity Synthesis - Characterized by clarity and acceptance in which one moves beyond the dichotomized worldview to an incorporation of one's sexual orientation as one aspect of a more integrated identity.
Task: Integrate gay and lesbian identity so that instead of being the identity, it is on aspect of self.
Possible Responses: Continues to be angry at heterosexism, but with decreased intensity. Allows trust of others to increase and build. Gay and lesbian identity is integrated with all aspects of "self". Feels all right to move out into the community and not simply define space according to sexual orientation.
Possible Needs: Continues to be angry at heterosexism, but with decreased intensity. Allows trust of others to increase and build. Gay and lesbian identity is integrated with all aspects of "self". Feels alright to move out into the community and not simply define space according to sexual orientation.
Source: Adapted from Cass, V. Homosexual Identity Development, 1979.
Developmental Concerns for GLBT Students
The University years are years of extreme change. Students are confronted with a variety of issues. Each issue is dealt with differently based on the students' maturity and the experiences that he or she has had. As a result, the students may be struggling with his or her identity may have a more difficult task as these issues appear.
Many activities during the undergraduate years encourage students to develop self-esteem and a distinct identity. For the gay, lesbian, and bisexual student, answering the questions, "Who am I?" can be very difficult. Because homosexuality and bisexuality are not widely accepted or even seen as healthy or acceptable by many people, gay, lesbian, and bisexual students begin the self- esteem battle a few steps back. They may question their self worth and wonder where they fit in to society and the university community. In addition, the majority of activities during the undergraduate years are heterosexually based. Whether social functions or dating, the gay, lesbian, and bisexual student can experience extreme anxiety as he or she decides how to "play the game". Coupled with this issue is the fact that most gay, lesbian, and bisexual students do not find a community with which to connect initially. As a result, gay, lesbian, and bisexual students may feel even more isolated than heterosexual students may.
During college years, students also begin to make decisions about what role religion will play in their lives. For gay, lesbian, and bisexual students, coming to terms with their religious beliefs can be a difficult task in light of the fact that homosexuality and bisexuality are not accepted in most religious environments. Other issues that with challenge gay, lesbian, and bisexual students will be coming to terms with career goals and health related issues such as coping with AIDS and the fear that goes with it.
In addition, there are some unique issues that face gay and lesbian students that heterosexual student do not have to face. There are differences between gay men and lesbians in the process of identifying oneself as lesbian or gay. Men seem to become more anxious and concerned about the possibility that they might be gay than women. Once the identification has been made, men tend to view it as a discovery in that they have finally acknowledged their homosexuality. Women, however, reconstruct the past by examining and emphasizing their significant friendships/relationships with other women. In addition, there are issues concerning:
1. Grieving the loss of membership in the dominant culture and entry into a permanently stigmatized subculture. 2. The experience of being a minority, especially an invisible minority and its impact on one's life. 3. Lack of family support or strong role models to help them deal with their new found status and identity. 4. Potential lack of peer support. Source: Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University
Suggestions for Working with GLBT Students
- Don't be surprised when someone comes out to you. - Respect confidentiality. It is imperative that you can be trusted. - Be informed. Most of us are products of a homophobic society. It is important that you are aware of the needs of gay, lesbian, and bisexual students. - Examine your own biases. If you are uncomfortable dealing with the issue and know that you are unable to be open and accepting, you need to refer the student to someone else. - Know when and where to keep help. Know all available resources at the national, state, local, and campus level. - Maintain a balanced perspective. Sexual thoughts and feelings are only a small (but important) part of a person's self. - Understand the meaning of "sexual orientation". Each person's sexual
orientation is natural to that person. - Deal with feelings first. You can be helpful by just listening and allowing a lesbian, gay, or bisexual student the opportunity to vent feelings. - Help, but don't force. Lesbian, gay, and bisexual students to move at the pace they feel most comfortable with. - Be supportive. Share with them that this is an issue that others must deal with too. - Don't try to guess who's gay. - Challenge bigoted remarks and jokes. This shows support. Source: Parents, Friends, and Families of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) Heterosexual Questionnaire
1. What do you think caused you heterosexuality? 2. When and how did you first decide you were a heterosexual? 3. Is it possible your heterosexuality is just a phase and you may grow out of it? 4. Is it possible your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex? 5. Isn't it possible that all you need is a good gay lover? 6. Heterosexuals have histories of failures in gay relationships. Do you think you may have turned to heterosexuality out of fear of rejection? 7. If you've never slept with a person of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that? 8. If heterosexuality is normal, why are a disproportionate number of mental patients heterosexual? 9. Who have you disclosed your heterosexual tendencies? How did they react? 10. Your heterosexuality doesn't offend me as long as you don't try to force it on me. Why do you people feel so compelled to seduce others into your sexual orientation? 11. If you choose to nurture children, would you want them to heterosexual, knowing the problems they would face? 12. The great majority of child molesters are heterosexuals. Do you really consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual teachers? 13. Why do you insist on being so obvious, and making a public spectacle of your heterosexuality? Cant' you just be what you are and keep it quiet? 14. How can you ever hope to become a whole person if you limit yourself to a compulsive, exclusive, heterosexual object choice and remain unwilling to explore and develop your normal, natural, healthy, God-given homosexual potential? 15. Heterosexuals are noted for assigning themselves and each other to narrowly restricted, stereotyped sex-roles. Why do you cling to such unhealthy role-playing? 16. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? 17. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rating is spiraling. What are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? 18. How could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual, considering the menace of overpopulation? 19. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed with which you might be able to change if you really wanted to. Have you considered aversion therapy? 20. Do heterosexuals hate and/or distrust others of their own sex? Is that what makes them the way they are?
Source: Safe Zone resource manual - Southern Mississippi University GLBT Supportive Environment Assessment
? T ? F My campus has a gay/lesbian/bisexual student organization supported by student government funds.
? T ? F My campus has a gay/lesbian/bisexual support group through our counseling
center.
? T ? F My campus has a gay/lesbian/bisexual staff association.
? T ? F My campus has courses taught regarding the gay/lesbian/bisexual culture.
? T ? F My campus' affirmative action statement includes sexual orientation.
? T ? F My campus has a minority affairs office that includes gay/lesbian/bisexuals as part of the groups they serve.
? T ? F My housing office has a clearly stated policy in the student handbook or conduct code that prohibits harassment/discrimination to minorities including gay/lesbian/bisexual persons.
? T ? F My housing office does not grant immediate room changes on the basis of sexual orientation, unless there is a presence of danger to a resident.
? T ? F There are openly gay/lesbian/bisexual students in my office.
? T ? F There are openly gay/lesbian/bisexual professionals on my campus.
? T ? F There is a workshop each semester on gay/lesbian/bisexual student issues that is handled through out training development/human recourses office.
? T ? F The college/university monitors publications, fliers, and handbooks to assure that they do not exclude gay/lesbian/bisexual persons by assuming heterosexuality.
? T ? F There is a policy that allows married couples to serve as hall directors/area coordinators, and the college/university extends this same offer to gay/lesbian/bisexual couples.
? T ? F There is a strong commitment in organizations on campus to treat all people equally. This is evident with out gay/lesbian/bisexual population as it is with ethnic minorities.
Source: Adapted from an unknown author. A Brief History of Homosexuality in America
Despite the fact that humans have never limited their sexual pleasure to what we now call heterosexual intercourse, the history of homosexuality is relatively short. The genital anatomy of one's partners-or what Freud calls one's "object choice"-did not become the definitive criterion for distinguishing homosexual and heterosexual selves until the last third of the nineteenth century. During the 1860's and 70's European public administrators began noticing that some people were organizing their lives not around family, household, and reproduction but around various forms of sexual pleasure. This was probably a recent phenomenon made possible by the forces of capitalism, which tended to draw people off the land into cities away from their parishes and families and to reduce the importance of arranged marriage. Alarmed, officials began studying these populations, whom they characterized as sexual deviants and grouped according to the particular practices they engaged in. One such class of deviant came to be called "homosexuals". Homosexuals quickly became the target of medical, psychiatric, and legal intervention, and as early as the 1870, they came together in such places as Bavaria to fight criminalization of sodomy. Until the Nazis destroyed Magnus Hirschfeld's homosexual archives in Berlin and hundreds of thousands of homosexual people were sent to die in concentration camps, the homosexual movement in Germany was widespread and influential. In the U.S., the history of homosexual culture and politics is even shorter than it is in Europe. The largest and best-known communities are in New York, Los Angeles, and San Francisco, and there are reasons for that. First, because of economic dislocations and farm crises in the first half of the 20th century, people migrated to large cities to find work. Once there, they were often forced to live outside traditional family structures, many in same sex settings such as military and industrial barracks, for prolonged periods. Those with homosexual inclinations found one another at the same time that they found the freedom to express themselves without ever-present familial and religious disapproval. For women in particular this was a new experience. In addition to economics changes, another extremely significant factor in the development of coastal gay and lesbian enclaves was the ban on gays in the military. After W.W.11, thousands of gay and lesbian people were dishonorably discharged from the armed services, and many were simply dumped in port cities. At times, several hundred ex-service people were deposited in San Francisco per day. They could not go home in disgrace, so they stayed. The first known homosexual political organization in the U.S. was the Mattachine Society, founded in November of 1950 in Los Angeles. This underground emancipation movement was the brainchild of Harry Hay, a young musicologist who had honed his organizing skills in the ranks of one of the most underground political movements in America in this century, the Communist Party. As Hay well knew, persecution of homosexuals was rampant. Police constantly entrapped and brutalized gay people. Public disclosure of homosexuality was enough to get most people fired from their jobs and ostracized from families and communities. By early 1953 under President Eisenhower, homosexuality became by executive order a necessary and sufficient reason in itself to fire any federal employee from his or her job. Most defense industries and others with government contracts followed suit, and the U.S. Postal Service aided these industries by putting tracers on suspected homosexuals' mail in order to gather enough evidence for dismissal and possibly arrest. The Mattachine Society drew tremendous support after one of its founders, Dale Jennings, was arrested for "lewd and dissolute behavior" in February 1952. Jennings took the unheard course of acknowledging his homosexuality in court while pleading innocent to the charges against him, thus forcing authorities to draw a distinction between being homosexual and being guilty of illegal activity. The jury was deadlocked and a retrial ordered, but the DA's office dropped all charges. Publicizing this victory was not easy, however. There was a news blackout on all the information regarding homosexuality; no press releases were accepted by any newspapers, magazines, or radio stations. The Mattachine Society was forced to circulate information solely through postings and flyers distributed in areas where homosexuals were believed to congregate. Nevertheless, the event drew tremendous, if quiet, support, and membership in the Mattachine Society grew by several thousand in succeeding weeks. Fears generated by Joseph McCarthy's campaign to rid America of Communists
eventually led to the neutralization of the Mattachine Society. By late 1954 it was the weak, fully public, assimilationist organization whose main purpose was to convince heterosexuals that homosexuals presented no threat whatsoever to any of their values and were in fact exactly like them but for sexual preference. The lesbian organization Daughters of Bilitis, founded in San Francisco in 1955, did not fare much better, although both groups managed to sustain publications with national circulation through the 1950's and 60's. By 1969, there were about fifty "homophile" organizations in the US, all fairly small. The main reason for the lack of visibility in post-war America was persecution- religious persecution, discrimination in employment, violence, and police brutality. Non-celibate gay people were condemned by and unwelcome in most mainstream religious organizations not only as leaders but even simply as members. This led the Reverend Troy Perry, a Baptist, to found the Metropolitan Community Church in 1968. Today the MCC is the largest gay and lesbian religious organization in this country and by far the largest in the South. Discrimination in employment probably ranked as the most threatening type of persecution gay people faced and still face-second only to physical assault in its violence but affecting far more people. Eisenhower's executive order stood from 1953 until 1993. There has never been any employment protection for gay people as there is now for straight white women, straight men, and women who belong to racial and ethnic minorities. Employers routinely refuse to hire gay people regardless of their qualifications and fire any who manage to be hired while closeted. Still, the ugliest of all forms of discrimination was and is undoubtedly gay bashing, especially when carried out by public officials. Police harassment and brutality have been constant features of gay and lesbian life for decades. Indefinite detainment's, beatings, and public humiliations are only the tip of the iceberg. Lesbian and male drag queens through the 1950s and 1960s suffered frequent rapes and sexual assaults committed by police officers, sometimes inside police precincts. Moreover, police were certainly no help when beatings, rapes, and lesser indignities were visited upon gay and lesbian people by civilians. It was in this atmosphere of terror and brutality that patrons of the Stonewall Inn in New York's Greenwich Village resisted a police raid in 1969. The Stonewall Inn was a working class gay and lesbian bar frequented by cross- dressers of both sexes. Police raids were common then and ugly. On the night of June 29, 1969, police attempted to raid the bar as usual, but the regulars were fed up. As the officers entered the building, patrons barricaded them inside and held them there. Thus began three days of rioting. At one point, it was estimated that the gays held eight square blocks of the city. Word of the riots spread quickly through homophile organizations around the country. It was at that point that what had been since 1954 a rather quiet assimilationist movement became militant. In December 1973, this movement achieved a major victory when pressure groups succeeded in forcing the American Psychiatric Association to remove homosexuality from its list of mental illnesses. This change eliminated one of the reasons employers so often fire non-heterosexuals and one of the reason judges so often awarded custody to heterosexual over homosexual parents-but only one. Through the early 1970s, gay and lesbian communities pushed for anti- discrimination laws, and they were successful in a few cities. By 1977, California even had its first openly gay elected official; Harvey Milk was elected San Francisco City Supervisor from District 5. Nevertheless, it was also in 1977 that Anita Bryant began her anti-gay campaign in Dade County, Florida, which was calculated to repeal Miami's legal protections for gay citizens. Throughout 1977, there were successful referenda to repeal gay rights laws across the country-in St. Paul, Wichita, and Eugene. In 1978, California state senator John Briggs introduced a move to prohibit homosexuals from teaching in California public schools. The initiative was defeated in November after a series of statewide debates between Briggs and Harvey Milk. It looked like gay rights would hold firm in California, but less than three weeks later Harvey Milk and pro-gay San Francisco mayor George Mascone lay dead, assassinated by former city supervisor Dan White. An all straight jury subsequently gave White the lightest possible sentence on a charge
of manslaughter. San Francisco's gay population rioted; but the heyday of pro- gay politics was over in that city and anti-gay violence skyrocketed. Not long after, scientists at the Centers for Disease Control began to notice a number of immune-deficiency-related illnesses in the gay male populations of major cities. Public officials (who did not know what caused the illnesses or exactly how they were spread) began closing down establishments where gay people gathered. Not surprisingly, gay people resisted these moves, seeing them as just another ploy on the part of politicians and police to destroy gay communities and to oppress individuals. Tensions between gay communities and various branches of government increased. In 1986 in Bowers v. Hardwick the U.S. Supreme Court held that states have a right to criminalize even private and consensual sexual behavior. Specifically the court said Georgia had a right to punish Michael Hardwick for sodomy even though his act occurred in private. The police officer who over-heard and then witnessed Hardwick's act had entered the house in order to speak to one of Hardwick's housemates about a traffic violation. Officer Bowers placed Hardwick under arrest in his own bedroom. The following year, 1987, the second March on Washington was held. It was one of the largest civil right demonstrations in this country's history, drawing more than 650,000. The next day 5,000 demonstrators converged on the Supreme Court steps, and an organization new even to most lesbian and gay Americans, ACT-UP, made its first national appearance. Gay politics, like gay lives, had changed dramatically since Harry Hay founded the Mattachine Society only thirty- seven years before. Things have changed. However, in many respects life has not gotten any easier. The FBI tells us violence against gay people and destruction of gay property and establishments is on the rise, and the crimes committed against us are getting uglier and deadlier. There are efforts in dozens of states and localities to repeal anti- discrimination laws where they exist and to prohibit them where they do not yet exist so that non-heterosexual people will have no avenue for changing the laws that affect them. More and more people are out of the closet, but while that may relieve and liberate in some ways, it also makes people easy targets for discrimination and hatred.
Source: Safe On Campus resource manual - Western Michigan University In the News
Every Child Deserves A Safe Place to Learn (MI)
The following is an excerpt from an article printed in the Detroit News. Any opinions either stated or suggested are not necessarily those of GLSEN or its members.
By Deb Price / The Detroit News August 26, 2002
When he was a ninth grader, Nathan Triplett was hit in the back of the head by a book with such force that he was knocked unconscious.
By the time the Kalamazoo teen came to in the boys' gym locker room, his mysterious attacker had vanished, leaving Nathan terrified about the escalating anti-gay violence and taunting he was experiencing at school. Turning to his gym teacher for help, Nathan got a "boys will be boys" brush-off.
"I was too afraid to do anything, so I just stayed quiet," recalls Triplett, now an 18-year-old entering freshman at Michigan State University. As summer ends and kids head back to school, those of us too old to be menaced by schoolhouse bullies should focus on the fact that America is still flunking out when it comes to protecting school children from anti-gay attacks. Many of the victims aren't even gay. In Triplett's case, his interest in theater and choir had led several older boys to mistakenly think he was gay. "Initially, I just tried to defend myself by saying things like, 'No, that's not how it is. You guys are just being silly.' It turned me into a homophobe for a while. But I realized that's not what I
wanted to be," he explains.
So, he courageously started responding by saying it doesn't matter what his sexual orientation is and that everyone deserves respect. And he and several classmates formed a gay-straight alliance at Portage Central High School to create a safe place to talk about gay issues and how to stop anti-gay harassment.
In addition to lifting spirits, Nathan's alliance lobbied state lawmakers in support of the safe schools bill by House Democratic Leader Buzz Thomas of Detroit. They also participated in the annual "Day of Silence" in which more than 150,000 gay and gay-friendly students around the country didn't speak for an entire school day to call attention to the isolation gay students feel.
Of the 47 million kids entering pre-kindergarten through 12th grade classrooms, 36 million will attend schools in states without laws against anti-gay harassment. That's wrong, as seven states -- California, Connecticut, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Vermont, Washington and Wisconsin -- and the District of Columbia have made clear by enacting such laws. (Anti-bully legislation is awaiting New Jersey Democratic Gov. James McGreevey's signature.)
The latest survey of high school students identifying as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered spotlights the seriousness of the problem:
- 83 percent of the youths reported being verbally harassed, the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network found. - 21 percent said they had been physically assaulted. - 82 percent said school officials never or only sometimes intervened to stop anti-gay incidents. - 31 percent said they had missed at least one day of school in the previous month because they didn't feel safe.
GLSEN Executive Director Kevin Jennings says his group's members -- many of them students in the nation's 2,000 gay-straight alliances -- are trying to create a climate in which students feel it's "un-cool" to be anti-gay and to get more state legislatures to outlaw bullying. "I'd like to see the scales change so bigotry is punished," he explains.
As a college student, Triplett plans to continue working to end anti-gay harassment in elementary, middle and high schools.
"Making tangible changes in our school that will continue to help students was really empowering for me," Triplett says. "It's wrong that it was so easy for someone to assault me at school, where I should have felt safe."
Every schoolchild deserves a safe place to learn and grow. Let's create them.
Source: Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network website, 2002.
Sexual Minorities on Community Colleges Campuses
Participants in the ongoing dialogue surrounding multiculturalism and inclusiveness on community college campuses are beginning to incorporate the topic of sexual minorities - lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgendered (LGBT) students - in the debate. This digest provides a review of current literature on the topic. Notably absent in the literature is research specific to community colleges; however, several publications have begun to address the topic of LGBT undergraduate students.
A number of problems complicate the study of the LGBT student population.
First, since there are no data available on the number of LGBT students in American higher education, it is impossible to determine the size or prevalence of the LGBT student population on community college campuses. Current numbers are grounded in sociological studies dating back more than 50 years. Second, an obstacle to be understood when studying LGBT students is the identification of a population that, due to social stigma, may not wish to be identified. Any study of sexual minorities relies on self-reporting because, by definition, the "coming out" process is a form of self-selection; those who do not come out are never included in research efforts. Finally, this research is being conducted across a disparate set of disciplines, such as sociology, psychology, political science, law, and education, making comparisons difficult.
One reason for the paucity of study may be fear that faculty, staff, and administrators who wish to study LGBT students may be perceived as gay (Leider, 1999). Often, such perceptions are more than just a damper on an academic career; they can lead to the end of that career. According to Sanlo (1999), the mere perception of faculty or staff as gay may result in termination of employment in some states.
One area of concern to both researchers and the higher education community is anti-gay violence and harassment. Research in this area is complicated by the fact that many LGBT student victims fail to report crimes of this nature to campus or legal authorities (Downey & Stage, 1999). One researcher's response to this problem has been to study the perpetrators of anti-gay violence and harassment instead of their victims (Franklin, 1998).
Anti-gay sentiment toward LGBT students by their fellow students is a subject well represented in the educational literature on four-year institutions (Reinhardt, 1997). Findings from the only study to examine anti-gay violence and harassment on community college campuses (Franklin, 1998) indicate that the problem is more widespread than previously thought. Franklin's anonymous survey, conducted at six San Francisco Bay-area community colleges, indicated that of the 484 respondents, 24 percent had engaged in verbal harassment of individuals perceived to be gay or lesbian. Another 10 percent admitted to committing physical violence or threats of violence against presumed gay men or lesbians. In other words, more than 1 in 3 community college students had engaged in hate speech or hate crimes on the six campuses studied.
Student development is another concern. It is well documented that college students undergo significant measurable change in factual knowledge, cognitive abilities, values, attitudes, and psychosocial development (Chickering and Reisser, 1993). In addition to these changes, LGBT students often undergo an additional and unique sexual identity process. A series of discrete steps in the process of identity formation are discernible. Cass's (1979) six-stage Theory of Homosexual Identity Formation informs much of the present work in the field. Present day researchers theorize five stages (Sanlo, 1998) while others identify four (Evans, Forney, and Guido-DiBrito, 1998). Regardless of the number of stages posited, it is now common to see students arriving at community colleges and four-year institutions already in some stage of this developmental process and seeking the services of student affairs professionals (Sanlo, 1998).
There are added challenges for those students whose identities are complicated by multiple group membership or rejection of sexual labels. Students of color who also happen to be sexual minorities are frequently confronted with the problem of identifying with one or the other group. In their racial group they may be subject to homophobic bigotry, while in their sexual identity group they may have to deal with racism and prejudice (Wall, 1991). There are those students, too, who engage in same-sex behavior but do not identify as gay, lesbian, or bisexual, who reject sexual labels altogether but who nevertheless experience confusion regarding their feelings and behaviors (Green, 1998). As
LGBT students undergo the process of sexual identity formation in largely hostile community college environments, they may fail to persist to graduation or they may exhibit other problems, thereby necessitating intervention by the institution (Sanlo, 1998).
Many LGBT issues are common to community college campuses and four-year institutions. One is the "commuter campus syndrome." This syndrome, in which students attend classes but don't become involved in campus life, contributes to students' inability to establish relationships with LGBT peers or create a sense of LGBT community on campus (Sanlo, 1998). LGBT students living off campus with parents are especially affected, as are those working full- or part-time while attending college. Both situations adversely affect students' ability to become involved in campus-based LGBT activities.
A lack of institutional support services and inadequate opportunities to interact with other LGBT students, faculty, and staff, may also play a significant role in sexual minority students' failure to persist. Finally, administrative barriers to the formation of LGBT student groups may interfere with these students' abilities to form contacts and friendships. Typical of these is the practice of some institutions of printing the home telephone numbers of LGBT student group leaders in campus publications. For those students who may not be "out" to family or friends, this is a violation of their privacy. Making this information public may also leave these students vulnerable to anti-gay telephone harassment as well (Sanlo, 1998).
Few studies concerning LGBT students on community college campuses are being conducted. While we know little about these students, we do know that they are being subjected to harassment and hate crimes by their peers. Recent changes in state and federal law seem to indicate that failure by community college administrators to protect these students may lead to legal action against administrators and institutions. While a legal discussion is beyond the scope of this digest, it is clear that LGBT community college students have a set of needs that are clamoring for attention.
Two resources have become available to those working with LGBT students at post- secondary educational institutions. Edited by Ronni Sanlo in 1998, Working with Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender College Students: A Handbook for Faculty and Administrators is a practitioner's handbook that compiles together forty essays written by researchers and practitioners, who cover a broad range of topics pertinent to LGBT college students.
Improving campus life for LGBT students should begin with an assessment of the current state of campus efforts. Nan Ottenritter (1998) has created an "Institutional Assessment of Sexual Minority Status Checklist" containing twelve assessment areas by which institution's leaders may judge whether it is meeting its LGBT students' needs.
Source: Steven Leider, 2000 - ERIC Clearinghouse for Community Colleges
Resources
Campus Resources
Affirmative Action Report any kind of discrimination or harassment to this office 331-2215
Counseling and Career Development Center 204 Student Services Building 331-3266
Dean of Students Office 202 Student Services Building 331-3585
Out-n-About - Registered Student Organization Contact the Student Life Office for more information 331-2345
Women's Center 161 Kirkhof Center 331-2748
Community Resources
GIFT - Gays in Faith Together A faith-based support group for the GLBT community of Grand Rapids; also with support groups specifically for GLBT youth.
Phone: 616/774-0446 Website: http://www.gaysinfaithtogether.org
GLSEN of GR - Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network of Grand Rapids The local chapter of the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network strives to assure that each member of every school community is valued and respected regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity/expression.
Phone: 616/791-9755 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.glsengr.org
The Network of Western Michigan Serving the LGBT Community of West Michigan through Advocacy, Coalition & Education.
Phone: 616/458-3511 Website: http://www.the-lgbt-network.org PFLAG of GR - Parents, Friends, and Families of Lesbians and Gays of Grand Rapids The Grand Rapids chapter of Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays promotes the health and well-being of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons, their families and friends.
PFLAG provides opportunity for dialogue about sexual orientation, and acts to create a society that is healthy and respectful of human diversity.
All members of the family are welcome at their monthly meetings. From grandparents to little brothers to spouses, you'll always find someone to talk to for support.
Phone: 616/336-1382 Email: [email removed] Website: http://geocities.com/WestHollywood/Heights/8183
Reconciliation Metropolitan Community Church ALL are welcome in MCC...a worldwide fellowship of Christian churches with a special outreach to the world's gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender communities.
300 Graceland NE Grand Rapids, MI 49505 Phone: 616/364-7633 Website: http://www.ufmcc.com
Sons and Daughters Coffee House and Bookstore Coffee house and bookstore serving the GLBT community of Grand Rapids.
962 Cherry Street SE Grand Rapids, MI 49506 Phone: 616/459-8877
State and National Resources
American Psychological Association - Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Concerns Program 750 First Street, NE Washington, DC 20002 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.apa.org
COLAGE - Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere 3543 18th Street, #17 San Francisco, CA 94110 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.colage.org
GLAAD - The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation 1375 Sutter Street, Suite 222 San Francisco, CA 94109 Website: http://www.glaad.org
GLSEN - Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network 121 West 27th Street, #804 New York, NY 10001 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.glsen.org
Human Rights Campaign - HRC 919 18th Street, NW #800 Washington, DC 20006 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.hrc.org
Lambda Legal Defense and Education Fund 120 Wall Street, #1500 New York, NY 10005-3904 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.lambdalegal.org
NGLTF - National Gay and Lesbian Task Force 1700 Kalorama Road, NW Washington, DC 20009 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.ngltf.org
PFLAG - Parents, Friends, and Family of Lesbians and Gays 1726 M Street, NW #400 Washington, DC 20007 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.pflag.org
SBNN - Straight But Not Narrow P.O. Box 71202 Marietta, GA 30007 Email: [email removed] Website: http://dislecksea.home.mindspring.com/sbnn.html
Triangle Foundation 19641 West Seven Mile Road
Detroit, MI 48219 Email: [email removed] Website: http://www.tri.org REPORT HATE CRIMES at 1-800-7triangle
References
365-Day Odyssey through Sexual Orientation handbook by J. Action of Ball State University and J. Workman of Ferris State University. Unpublished.
American Psychological Association - Committee for Lesbian and Gay Concerns. (2000). Website: www.apa.org/pubinfo/
Blumenfeld, W. J. (Ed). (1992). Homophobia: How we all pay the price. Boston: Beacon Press.
Broido, E. M. (2000). Ways of being an ally to lesbian, gay, and bisexual students. In V. A. Wall & N. J. Evans (Eds.). Toward acceptance: Sexual orientation issues on campus (p. 345-369). Lanham, MD: University Press of America.
Buhrke, R. A., & Douce, L. A. (1991) Training issues for counseling psychologists in working with lesbian women and gay men. The Counseling Psychologist, 19(2), 216.
Cass, V. C. (1979). Homosexual identity formation: A theoretical mode. Journal of Homosexuality, 9(2-3), 105-126.
Committee on Lesbian and Gay Concerns. (1991). Avoiding heterosexual bias in language. American Psychologist, 46, 973-974.
Currah, P., & Minter, S. (2000). Transgender equality: A handbook for activists and policymakers. Washington, DC: National Gay and Lesbian Task Force Policy Institute.
Duke University. (n.d.) Safe On Campus Resource Manual. Unpublished.
Herek, G. & Berrill, K. T. (Eds.). Hate crimes: Confronting violence against lesbians and gay men. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.
Hogan, S., & Hudson, L. (1998). Completely queer: The gay and lesbian encyclopedia. New York, NY: Henry Holt.
The Human Rights Campaign online at http://www.hrcusa.org.
The Governor's Commission of Gay and Lesbian Youth: Report and Recommendations. July 1993. Boston, MA.
Leider, S. (2000). Sexual minorities on Community Colleges campuses. Obtained online at the ERIC Clearinghouse for Community Colleges online.
Obear, K. (1988/1990). Opening doors to understanding and acceptance: A facilitator's guide to presenting workshops on lesbian, gay, and bisexual issues. Amhurst, MA: The Human Advantage.
Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays online at http://www.pflag.org.
Price, D. (2002). Every child deserves a safe place to learn (MI). Obtained online from the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network website at http://www.glsen.org.
Southern Mississippi University. (n.d.). Safe Zone resource manual. Unpublished.
Texas A&M University. (n.d.). Aggie Allies website.
Texas A&M University. (1993). Gay and Lesbian Student Services Speaker's Bureau Manual. Unpublished
Tyler, J. M., Jackman-Wheitner, L., Strader, S., & Lenox, R. (1997). A change- model approach to raising awareness of Gay, Lesbian, and Bisexual issues among graduate students in counseling. Journal of Sex Education and Therapy, 22(2), 37-43.
Western Michigan University. (2001). Safe On Campus Resource Manual. Unpublished.
Wall, V. A., & Evans, N. J. (1991) Using psychological development theories to understand and work with gay and lesbian persons" Evans, N. J., & Wall, V. A. (Eds.). Beyond Tolerance: Gays, Lesbians and Bisexuals on Campus, American College Personal Association.
From the 2013 version of the site. Details, prices and links may be out of date, so check them against your own campus policies.